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Discover the Unexpected: Top 10 Fun Facts About Oliver Cromwell You Never Knew!

illustration of oliver-cromwell
Dive into the intriguing world of Oliver Cromwell, where history, controversy, and a dollop of lesser-known tidbits make for a fascinating journey!

1. "Warts and All" Selfie

When Oliver Cromwell went in for a selfie, he made sure to keep things "warts and all": The Lord Protector of England was renowned for demanding realistic portraits of himself, complete with pimples and imperfections, defying the trend of vanity and self-indulgence common in the monarchy at the time.
Source => historyextra.com

2. The Partial Grinch

The Holidays Are Canceled? Hold Your Reindeer, Puritan Pals! Oliver Cromwell may have been painted as the Grinch who swiped Christmas, but let's set the record straight: In reality, Cromwell didn't ban Christmas per se, but as Lord Protector, he did enforce stricter laws on church services during the festive day and promoted measures to replace raucous celebrations with solemn contemplation during the mid-winter season, which included yuletide. So, while Christmas was more scrooge-like under Cromwell, it wasn't entirely off the calendar!
Source => historicengland.org.uk

3. The Disembodied Head Tour

"Head"ing on a wild adventure: Oliver Cromwell's disembodied cranium embarked on a rollicking odyssey after his death, appearing in various peculiar places such as a private museum, the hands of a failed actor, and ultimately finding peaceful rest at his alma mater in Cambridge.
Source => en.wikipedia.org

4. Partying Son Outlives Father

Move over, Dad: Richard Cromwell, the overshadowed and overshadowing-party-animal son of Oliver Cromwell, managed to outlive his father's fame by reaching the ripe old age of 85 – the longest-lived British head of state until Queen Elizabeth II dethroned him in 2012. Serious hat tip: As the second and final Lord Protector of the Commonwealth, Richard's brief nine-month reign in 1658 was marred by his military inexperience, icy relations with the army and Parliament, resulting in his peaceful resignation.
Source => en.wikipedia.org

MP to Military Commander

5. MP to Military Commander

From the Parliament halls to the battlefield, Oliver Cromwell certainly knew how to switch things up like a 17th-century DJ: He served as a Member of Parliament for East Anglia twice - from 1628 to 1629 and from 1640 to 1642 - before showcasing his skills as a military commander during the British Civil Wars and eventually morphing into the Lord Protector himself.
Source => nam.ac.uk

6. Humpty Dumpty's Head

Head over heels for history: Oliver Cromwell's decapitated head, after playing peek-a-boo atop Westminster Hall for over two awfully windy decades, tumbled down like Humpty Dumpty, only to be buried with pomp at Sydney Sussex College, Cambridge in 1960.
Source => medium.com

7. More Than a simple Farmer

You might think Oliver Cromwell was an old-school Farmville fanatic, meticulously tending to crops before entering the public eye. The truth, however, isn't quite so bucolic: Cromwell actually served as a minor landowner, collecting rents and managing tenants, after his father's passing. Prior to that, he was an educated fellow, attending Huntingdon grammar school and Sidney Sussex College, earning a degree, and then studying law at Lincoln's Inn of Court in London. It is there that he is believed to have planted the seeds for his personal life, meeting his wife Elizabeth, daughter of the knighted merchant Sir James Bourchier. Although he may have had his hands in the dirt at times, Oliver Cromwell was far more than a simple farmer!
Source => historic-uk.com

8. Forced Transportation and Piracy

Ahoy, me hearties! If you thought piracy was only for swashbuckling scallywags, feast your eyes on this: Oliver Cromwell forcibly transported many Irish folk to the West Indies as indentured servants during the mid-17th century, where they faced brutal treatment and harsh conditions, often drawing comparisons to African slaves in the Caribbean.
Source => en.wikipedia.org

9. The Fashionable, Radical Army

The New Model Army: not a fashionable line of action figures, but Oliver Cromwell's very own collection of Puritan fashionistas! In all seriousness: The New Model Army was a centralised, professional force raised from existing Parliamentarian armies during the First English Civil War, with its soldiers holding radical religious views and contributing to the establishment of the English Commonwealth from 1649 to 1660.
Source => en.wikipedia.org

FOMO Just Got Royal

10. FOMO Just Got Royal

Who needs a royal title when you've got a serious case of FOMO – Fear of Monarchical Opulence, that is! Oliver Cromwell was the living embodiment of this lesser-known psychological condition: the man gave King Charles II a royal run for his money at the Battle of Worcester, ascended to power as Lord Protector of England, Scotland, and Ireland, and even melted down the monarchy's finest, all while keeping his Puritanical beliefs in check and outright refusing that fancy-schmancy kingly crown.
Source => en.wikipedia.org

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